A young boy enters the barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer,
“This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.”

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?”

The boy takes the quarters and leaves. “What did I tell you?” said the barber.

“That kid never learns!”

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.

“Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?”

The boy licked his cone and replied, “Because the day I take the dollar, the game’s over!!!!”

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A man and a little boy entered a barbershop together.
After the man received the full treatment – shave, shampoo, manicure, haircut, etc. he placed the boy in the chair.

“I’m going to buy a green tie to wear for the parade,” he said. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

When the boy’s haircut was completed and the man still hadn’t returned, the barber said, “Looks like your daddy’s forgotten all about you.”

“That wasn’t my daddy,” said the boy. “He just walked up, took me by the hand and said, ‘Come on, son, we’re gonna get a free haircut!’”

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A blond was rollerblading with her headphones on.
She stopped at a hair salon and asked for a haircut.

She instructed that the hair stylist could not take off her headphones.

The stylist replied refusing to cut her hair, so she left.

She went to a different hair salon and said the same thing.

This time, the stylist agreed to cut her hair.

After a while, the blond fell asleep in the chair.

To wake her, the stylist took off the headphones.

The blond immediately fell on the floor, flopped and died.

Confused at what happened, the stylist put on the headphones.

They were saying: “breath in, breath out.”

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Marley stopped at the town barbershop for a haircut.
After thirty-five minutes of snipping and cutting, the barber held a mirror behind Marley’s head.

“How you like it?” asked the barber.

“Real fine,” said the redneck. “But how ’bout making it a little longer in the back?”